Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

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Slashman
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Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Slashman » Wed Jan 16, 2019 12:58 pm

If you want a different perspective, stand on your head.

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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by ZedF » Wed Jan 16, 2019 1:20 pm

The APA is largely right. Those conservative voices contesting this are doing so from the wrong context. These APA guidelines will be used by psychologists to help people who already feel like they have mental health problems due to male gender expectations... and the APA is correct that too much internalization of those expectations can be psychologically damaging.

Some aspects of male gender expectations can be healthy -- things like having courage can be useful for anybody. There are other aspects that are more likely to harm than to help. It's important to recognize that male gender expectations are not one size fits all, and that no societal convention is so perfect that its flaws ought not to be recognized and improved upon.
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Mecron
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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Mecron » Wed Jan 16, 2019 8:11 pm

I think the very fact it is the reactive right leaping on this is a big clue that the APA has found a serious problem. I hope their first paper is "Young boys need to stop being dehumanized and treated like animals."

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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Torezu » Wed Jan 16, 2019 10:59 pm

This response bit from the APA:

"Psychologists who treat men and boys already know that their male clients aren’t stereotypes. They have feelings, needs, and desires. They’re adaptable. They possess many positive masculine characteristics. The guidelines are designed to give psychologists a framework to help men and boys embrace their masculinity in ways that are helpful, rather than harmful, to their health and quality of life."

...leads me to think that the people who don't like this change are overreacting (in the wrong way) to a positive development, in much the same way they are overreacting to the recent Gillette PSA.
Last edited by Torezu on Wed Jan 16, 2019 11:09 pm, edited 1 time in total.

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Mecron
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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Mecron » Wed Jan 16, 2019 11:08 pm

Its like the right wing groups live in a world where its aliens or women that bully and make young men's lives a living hell or beat them while accusing them of not being man enough.

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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Slashman » Wed Jan 16, 2019 11:40 pm

Mecron wrote:
Wed Jan 16, 2019 8:11 pm
I think the very fact it is the reactive right leaping on this is a big clue that the APA has found a serious problem. I hope their first paper is "Young boys need to stop being dehumanized and treated like animals."
I think we treat animals better as a whole. We look for emotions that may not be there to make them feel closer to us. But we shut down any thing more than the bare minimum of emotion from a boy with phrases like "Big boys don't cry".
If you want a different perspective, stand on your head.

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Mecron
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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Mecron » Thu Jan 17, 2019 12:25 am

try comparing old school elementary boys and girls washrooms/showers.

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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Azrael Ultima » Tue Jan 22, 2019 2:16 pm

Slashman wrote:
Wed Jan 16, 2019 11:40 pm
I think we treat animals better as a whole. We look for emotions that may not be there to make them feel closer to us. But we shut down any thing more than the bare minimum of emotion from a boy with phrases like "Big boys don't cry".
Just read "big boys" as male adults pretending to be strong and it makes a lot more sense.
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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Slashman » Tue Jan 22, 2019 3:37 pm

Well also in the sense that we tell our male kids to 'hurry up and become a man' while we shelter our girls. With usually a twisted view of what a man is muddying the waters.

I was waiting to collect my car from getting serviced the other day when I happened to hear a conversation between a young father and an older mother. The older mom was telling him to let go the reins on his son but keep a close eye on his daughter.

I mean it really hit me that this woman (a mother herself) was saying let your son run wild but shelter your daughter like your life depended on it. And I was like that's really twisted...
If you want a different perspective, stand on your head.

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Mecron
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Re: Boys will be boys...and other unhappy 'truths'

Post by Mecron » Tue Jan 22, 2019 8:07 pm

Its how we depower women from birth.

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